Final Words

[Deleted]

First off, I want to say thanks to Erik and Amanda for letting me come back into All-Stars. It's been an amazing game, and I'm honestly proud that I was 1 of 22 people that got to be a part of it.

I'm not too surprised Lex and Brett voted me, since I knew about since I woke up today from Colleen showing me conversations. I kinda wish we had thrown one more nullifier out there or at least the jury voted with us to tie it up so I can break it. I tried hard to split up an F2 and it backfired in my face.

Lex has played well to convince everyone he is with him, but people are talking now so good luck trying to keep people hoodwinked Lex.

Brett's been playing victim, like he's the good guy wrongfully accused, when he's betrayed people too and has tried hard to make it seem like Lex was his last hope in surviving.

Colleen, Alina, Austin.. I wish you 3 the best of luck, and I hope 2/3 of you make the finals. If not, I'll have to vote for the snakes lol.

[Deleted]

Oh and one more request...

Can I please please please do the memory challenge for fun if you guys do it? I loved that challenge back in Namibia! I will love you both forever if you let me <3

[Amanda Kimmel]

Of course you can do a challenge like that should it come up. No worries.

And thanks for playing!

[Deleted]

No problem!

[Erik Huffman]

Thank you for playing Boston, you did a great job

[Deleted]

Also, I needed to point something out since it probably is getting spread around pretty quickly because a bunch of people know. Yes, I did get upset at the fact I got voted out of All-Stars. Not because I didn't win, it's because I had people rooting for me and it sucks to have let them down, and also it's All-Stars, of course it's going to sting a little getting voted out of one of the most important games of Survivor for anyone. I decided that I was going to be done with ORGs LONG BEFORE this game even started regardless of my placing, but I just hate how it seems like now to everyone I'm only done because I lost the game, when it isn't like that at all. Amanda, yes in the past I've gotten upset over losing, although in SBB I was a wreck , Capri was one of my best game plays ever, and it stung a lot getting voted out of that game.

For me, I have RL stuff I need to focus on (college, getting a job, saving up enough to the point I can move out, etc.), and ORGing is going to slow me down on all of that because it is time consuming, which is why I'm done playing for a while. It has absolutely NOTHING to do with me losing All-Stars.

Sorry guys, I just needed to clear that up, just in case it got around to the host and it makes it sound like I'm only doing it cause of losing.

[Amanda Kimmel]

You were still upset about losing. And, to be brutally honest, I really think that quitting ORGs is what's best for you. Given what happened in SBB, and given what you did to Candice here and how you went out and that people think you're retiring because you lost (again)... it's probably for the best. ORGs don't seem to be the right fit for you, Bryan.

Remember: I'm just saying this as your friend. I'm trying to look out for your best interests, and although it may not appear that way, that's what I'm focused on. ORGs aren't for everyone - I've taken a break myself since I got sick of the lying - but it's not the losing that irks me. You need to take some time, go to college and have some experiences, and realize... losing means more than winning. Here:


Think about it, and tell me what that song is saying.

[Deleted]

Yeah I understand your trying to help, just sometimes it feels almost like insults .

For me, this was a first cause I've never been taken out by rewards in a game before (Well you can kinda sorta count Capri I guess since Benry gave Earl an immunity.) I think it was cause all we would have needed was 2 more nullifiers or the jury voting Brett (which we assumed was going to happen), and the vote could have tied, and I could have gotten Brett out, so that also was upsetting that all we needed was a few more prizes and I could have survived.

The Candice situation also was one I could have handled better. I thought if I tell her I was voting her, it'd hurt her cause me and her have been close for almost a year now, and I was simply looking out for her feelings and I ended up making a huge shitstorm out of it, I should have done it like the vote with Bob Dawg, and just nullified it so I'm not a part of that person leaving the game. It still gets to me now and that's been almost a month ago. I'm not like people like Curtis who just simply betray people and act proud of it. The fact I play with my heart is why I'm always upset when I betray people.

[Deleted]

I don't think you really mean to make your advice come across as insults and I understand that. That was what made it really hard to talk to you about stuff back in SBB , but I realize that you are trying to help, and I do appreciate that.

[Amanda Kimmel]

It's not a problem!

I sometimes find it hard to offer advice to you since you're so sensitive. I again don't mean to be rude, but you do need to toughen up a bit. You can still play with your heart and be loyal, but you shouldn't take losing so personally. Me... I only hate being lied to by people I like. THAT I take personally.

Just... work on putting yourself in the other person's shoes. For example:
"Why is Amanda saying this to me?"
"What would Candice think about me outright lying to her?"

Ask yourself those questions. It will help, trust me.

[Deleted]

So basically you're saying that I don't lose cause I'm not a bad player, but that's it's only catching bad luck at the end?

EDIT: Basically saying, losing has nothing to do with me lol.

[Amanda Kimmel]

No, I'm not saying that at ALL. Where the hell did you get that from?

My entire point is that you have to think about WHY you lost. It had NOTHING to do with bad luck this round. Let's go over some things...

SBB - you were extremely lucky here, and only lost because Lex and I seemed to win every HoH, though there were many reasons for you potentially losing every time we tried to kill you
Namibia - You had bad luck here, given a thunderc*** completely obliterating the game's integrity
Capri - You were voted out because your two enemies had immunity the round after a poorly-timed eChallenge. Bad luck? Somewhat.
Here - I can't tell you. Yet.

What I'm saying is this: Losing always has something to do with the player who lost. Just because you lose doesn't mean you're a bad player. When you lose, look upon yourself to improve. Figure out what you did wrong that you could do better next time. That is what makes a winner. A winner has lost before - not necessarily in Survivor, but they haven't always got their way. The real winners can learn from their losses. That's exactly what I'm trying to get you to do: Learn from your losses, rather than take them personally like you're a failure. The only reason why you haven't won yet is that you whine when you lose, rather than learn from your mistakes. You're perfectly capable of winning, as you proved in Capri, but... you just need to stop taking things so hard. Reflect upon past mistakes and things that didn't go your way. You can't always be lucky like you were in SBB and here.


I also want you to understand empathy. Instead of being insulted that I was trying to tell you that you were an idiot for posting that drama topic after Candice got the boot, you should have realized that I was trying to help you realize that you were being an idiot. You also should have thought that Candice would be betrayed, and she'd be hurt. She trusted you, Bryan. She liked you and protected you. And what did she get for it?

Candice wasn't upset at getting voted out. It was that you lied to her so sadistically after everything she'd done for you.

You need to put yourself in the other person's shoes, and ask yourself why. Your reply to my prior post didn't make any sense. Think about what I'm saying here, but also why I'm saying it. I'm trying to help.

Just remember: A person learns more from their losses than their victories. What you need to do is take great care to think about what went wrong and what you can do better. Me... I used to be a loser, too, but I've learned a lot from past experiences, and was able to win a Survivor game fairly quickly after entering the scene. My first two losses were not my fault - one was because a "friend" wanted to win the game badly, and expended our friendship in order to do so, but I eviscerated him so badly that he got no jury votes, and the second was because the host rigged me out because he's a douchebag.

However, I made a couple of mistakes in those games myself, and I learned from them. I know to not trust certain friends, for example. I also know not to sign up for a game if I don't know the host well enough, because he can rig me out if he pleases, or make me out to be a villain that I'm not. It was through these two experiences that I figured out who I COULD trust, and who I could not, and I applied that to three of my next four games and won them all. CYS Japan was a bit different, although I knew I couldn't trust Dylan there.

I'm just using myself as an example. Through experience will come a victory - it just takes more time for some people. Think about everything I am saying here, and come back and post what you need to do.

[Deleted]

Thanks for clearing that up Amanda, sorry for assuming that was what you meant...

I'll tell you this, I honestly never meant to do what I did to Candice. It was me being a complete idiot being put into a situation where I had to choose between two good friends, and I handled it the worst way possible. I've learned from that mistake, and the next time I'm in that boat again, I'm going to be honest to the friend that I'm going to vote out.

Was the speech a mistake? Yes, it was. It settled absolutely nothing, all it did was cause me to lose one of my close allies because I was annoyed and pissed at the time and just was tired of people thinking I was some cold-blooded, heartless bastard who was happy to take out his good friend, when it was the opposite. As I said, I'm not like people like Curtis. Curtis is proud when he cuts your throat (his game play I've seen is somewhat identical to the actual Lex in that sense.), but yet me when I do it, I genuinely feel bad. I was being a moron with how I handled situations that were new to me.

You're right though, I need to start learning from my mistakes and try to make my game play that much stronger. I mean lots of people do it in Survivor and they do a lot better, even if they don't win the game. I need to be empathetic and read how people I vote for/people I betray are going to feel before I make my move, which is something I've failed to realize.

Besides, I don't think I'm a bad player at all. I mean I've reached F6 in my first 5 ORGs which is better than a lot of ORGers do. Consistency >>>> Making Finals in my opinion.

In Capri it was a total reverse of how I usually am in ORGs. I was calm, no matter what. If something went wrong, I wouldn't panic, I would simply just try to adjust that situation and fix it. That's the kind of player I want to be and I'm going to improve to be that.. The person that stays calm no matter what, and won't take me leaving to heart as much I do, and learns from my mistakes if I leave the game. If I do that, then I will improve as an ORGer.

Sorry to ramble Amanda, I just wanted you to see I understand what you are saying.

[Deleted]

Thanks Amanda for the advice!

I think though I might just take a break from playing for a bit so I can focus on some RL stuff (College, job, etc.) I want to major in either performing arts or something with computers, I keep wavering lol just cause I could do singing in theater but I've never acted in my life. I just feel like I need some me time, and I haven't been able to have that much because I've been ORGing non-stop since last summer.

[Amanda Kimmel]

Glad to see that you learned from your mistakes with Candice. I taught Jake the same thing when he valued a game over me. He thought I'd be fine with it, but he handled it so poorly that I was insulted. He made it obvious that he cared about the game more and tried to separate me from Amanda. I loved chewing him out. Don't worry - him and I are good now. Since Erik is retiring from ORGs, Jake, as DD, will be taking over as co-host.

As for Curtis... yes, Lex fits him 100%. I was thinking about that earlier. I did not like Lex in Africa because he was a bastard. In All-Stars.... what he did to Colby and Ethan is very similar to the things Curtis loves to do. Curtis has found a great default Survivor for him.

The good thing is that you realize that your best performance was in Capri. I can safely say this: It was. People were saying you were a jury threat, and that's why you ultimately got voted out. Perhaps you should play as girls more often. It seemed to do wonders when compared to the train wreck you were in SBB.

As for your major in college, let me offer a suggestion: My college had a "breadth requirement" which stipulated that you take two 300+ level courses that do not pertain to either your major or minor. You have two options here:
A: If you're allowed a minor, major in one field and minor in the other
B: If you're not allowed a minor, take two classes for each your first semester, and then determine which path you like more after one semester.

You can always go in undeclared, and you should. If you go with option A, decide which one you want to devote more time to after you experience classes with said professors and students. Sometimes, some people change their major based on their professors. An example:
paperfanfan (4:29:01 PM): Graphic design, if you figure out what your professor likes, you can BS it
zZAndymaNZz (4:29:18 PM): lol
paperfanfan (4:29:34 PM): i guess in a way for that field its actually a good idea to BS it
paperfanfan (4:29:45 PM): but I didnt like it
paperfanfan (4:30:26 PM): I got low-average grades spending WEEKS on projects, doing them how I felt they needed to be
zZAndymaNZz (4:30:53 PM): :/
paperfanfan (4:30:57 PM): my highest grade was for something I doodled in 5 minutes
paperfanfan (4:31:11 PM): because it was what the professor liked
zZAndymaNZz (4:31:33 PM): Bad professor
paperfanfan (4:31:47 PM): pretty much
paperfanfan (4:31:59 PM): and they would hve been my professor for most stuff
paperfanfan (4:32:06 PM): if I'd stayed with that major

Rose changed HER major because she didn't like the professor she'd be dealing with the most. Keep that in mind. But it's probably best to play around in both for a bit. So what if it takes one extra semester to graduate - you'll have made the right decision. If you can find a way to major/minor in both or apply one to the breadth requirement, even better.


Thank you for taking the time to read my words, and I wish you the best of luck in improving! And you are very welcome!